I'm hoping to leave a trail of my special things on my blog.  As long as this site stays open then so will my blog, my family can trace back to find my special things.  Hopefully there will be many pieces of music I love, and have enjoyed listening to.  Tchaikovsky will be high on my list of special things, special music, which I have enjoyed and loved over the years.  The past four years, especially the last two years, have been the most difficult years because that's when I started to be affected by Bowel cancer.  What a whirlwind these past two years have been, I feel sick thinking about how sick I've felt undergoing treatments and surgeries.  Life has been many things to me.  Intense in every waking experience.  I've experienced life in my core, the core of who I am.  I have watched, I have listened, I have participated in life.  What a privilege to share my life with so many special people.  

I have lived, I have loved and I have learned.

I've been playing one of my favourite pieces of music for the past few days.  When my two children were around 3 and 5 years old I played it a lot for some reason.  I've found over the years, if I need to cry this will do it.  The first and last movements are the ones I listen to, and the ones that I feel closest resemble my life in music, which is a great deal of feeling.

I'm hoping to leave some special things for my 4 Grandchildren who I love with all my heart, and to my husband Alan, daughter Jessica and son Jake, who mean more to me than any words I can use to try and tell you.  

 I love you all my dear family.

 "Pathetique" Symphony number 6 is one of my special things, I join in with the conductor for this one.  It sums up my life in music, the intensity of experience and the depth of feeling I've experienced...
The first movement finishes just around 19 minutes 12 seconds...
The 4th movement, which is also one of my specials, and probably my favourite starts at 37 minutes... and is the last movement.  By 40 minutes I'm with the conductor who has teared up eyes.
I like the movements in between, but these two pieces sum up my life.  I feel at home in this music. 

...My dear Grandchildred, Alan, Jake and Jessica, if you follow the trail back to here, I love you always and forever.  Turn it up loud, it's the only way.